As someone who is over 40, I love a new beginning! I get so excited just thinking about all the future possibilities and opportunities that are coming my way next.
But…
Any time I’m at the beginning of a new chapter in my life, there’s a part of me that feels absolutely terrified. The uncertainty, the fear, the evaporating self-confidence, the feeling that I’m miles behind everyone else in the game of life. That little voice that whispers into my ear, “it’s too late.”
If you’re currently staring at a blank page at the beginning of a new life chapter—whether by choice or as a result of being blindsided by something like a job or a relationship loss, and no matter what you’ve accomplished—or haven’t accomplished—up until this point, you’re about to get a pep talk and an action plan from a fellow gal in her mid-40s who’s no stranger to reinvention and the turmoil it can cause.
Whatever the reason for your reinvention, whether it’s a forced reinvention or something you chose on your own, the biggest source of anxiety is going to be the uncertainty around what comes next and if you’re going to be successful. So these are a few things to remember to help you get through that uncertainty.
1. Your biggest growth is ahead of you. It doesn’t matter how old you are, there’s absolutely no reason why that can’t be true and it’s essential to really believe this as you start making changes. Think about your life up to this point. There’s a good chance you spent a lot of it focusing on other people’s needs—whether that’s kids, family, partners, a demanding boss, whatever. But now, you have this golden opportunity to make this next chapter about you and you alone. What would happen if you gave yourself permission to finally pursue your deepest desires with pure abandon?
Maybe you haven’t spent a lifetime taking care of other people. Maybe you’re just a late bloomer or a reformed underachiever, like me, and you feel like you haven’t done much of anything with your life up until this point. That’s even more of a reason to believe that your best years are ahead of you.
I basically partied my way through my early 20s. I was completely directionless, was in an awful relationship, had a string of crap jobs—got fired from several of them—and kind of wound up in a career that I knew I didn’t want to do forever, but I just didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. Finally, I decided I wanted to go to art school, spent 4 years getting a degree in design, and then 6 years into my new career as an art director, pushing 40 and still in $45,000 worth of student debt, realized I did not want to continue working in advertising. At that point I felt like I had no true calling, no other skills that would get me into a well-paying career, and I just didn’t know what I was going to do.
That’s when I decided to start a random side-hustle self-publishing books, and that’s what’s eventually led me down this road of being an online educator and a YouTube host, something I never in 10,000 years would have seen myself doing even 1 year before I started this channel.
This is why I absolutely believe that my biggest growth is STILL ahead of me. And that belief gets me so excited about what’s to come, even if I have no idea what that is yet. Remember, you still have half a life left to do something that excites and fulfills you! And the point is—you never know WHAT amazing opportunities lie ahead of you.
2. The next thing to remember is something that I heard Mel Robbins say, and that’s this: You’re never starting over; you’re always starting from experience. If you’re in your 40s, this is not your first rodeo. You’ve been through some really hard stuff before and you’ve come out on the other side with the knowledge that only experience can bring. And that knowledge is going to be tremendously advantageous in getting you where you need to go.
3. It’s okay to change course. The goals that you had at 20 are not the same goals you have at 40 or beyond. You should be thinking about changing course to something that better suits your current needs and desires.
4. You don’t need to have a fully fleshed out plan before you take that first step. Like Martin Luther King Jr. said, “You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.
I cover all of this in the video on my channel Reinventing Yourself Over 40 which you can watch below. But if you prefer reading, keep scrolling, and I’ll fill you in on the details.
Now that the pep talk is over, let’s get into your action plan.
By the way, if part of your reinvention is starting a new online business, please download my free guide, the 4 Step No Time to Waste Online Business Start-Up Blueprint from the description below. It’s a comprehensive guide that’s going to take you through all the steps necessary to get your online business off the ground.
Now, let’s get to your action plan!
This action plan is basically what I do at the end of each year when I’m goal-setting for the following year, and I think it’s a perfect exercise to go through during a reinvention phase as well, so grab your journal or a piece of paper and a pen and we’ll get started.
First, we’re going to start with a little reflection.
1. Look back to move forward. It can be really helpful to do a little review of your life so far. What’s worked for you and what hasn’t? Think of a few wins that you’ve had, but also think about the things that didn’t go the way you would have wanted them to. Try and think about what you could have done differently if you had the chance to go back. What’s held you back in the past? What excites you? What drains you? What major lessons have you learned? For me, when I look back, I realize that I spent way too long caring about what others think and it stopped me from doing some of the things I wanted to do, like joining the drama club in high school, or speaking up when I had something to say and no one else was saying it.
2. Define your dreams. What would a breakthrough year would look like for you? Ask yourself, what would I do if I couldn’t fail? Now’s not the time to censor yourself or pass judgment; consider all of your big ideas, possibilities, and dreams. Which of these ideas excites you the most? What would give you the most satisfaction? Think about your life across multiple domains: relationships, financial, vocational, health, spiritual. And here’s a little hint: your biggest potential often lies in the ideas that leave you feeling excited AND a little bit terrified. Asking myself these questions is what originally got me thinking about starting my own business and where that might lead. Like I said earlier, I never would have thought that I’d start a YT channel in a million years, but once I’d defined my dreams for my personal life I knew I needed to take some bigger action steps to make them happen.
3. Make a plan. Creating a plan is going to give you something to work toward and give you a sense of direction and control. You don’t need to know every detail of your plan, just the first set of action steps. Maybe that’s doing some research, talking to someone who has information about what you’re interested in doing, starting a class to learn a new skill. Once you have your plan, work incrementally toward achieving whatever dream that plan is in support of. You don’t need to make massive sweeping changes overnight. Incremental progress compounds with time, just like money in a bank account.
4. Get support. It can feel lonely during a big transition, so support is crucial! Try to find some other people who are also going through some sort of transition so you can help and encourage one another. I’ve always got 1 or 2 friends on speed dial who I know I can count on for support no matter what. And when it comes to my business I have a circle of fellow entrepreneurs who’ve 9 times out of 10 been through what I’m going through and can offer help and encouragement as well.
I hope reading this has helped to pump you up a little bit during what can be a scary, uncertain time, I really, truly believe that your best years are ahead of you and I know that you’ve got this.
Read this blog post next if you want to find out what the best online business to start this year is for you.
Chat soon,
Rachel
